Apparently Assassin’s Creed 2 is doing even better than anyone anticipated, and better than most games can ever hope.  Ubisoft released their fiscal report today and are claiming over 6 million units sold worldwide.  I can only assume these numbers are a direct result of my review.

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I seem to be one of the few people on the planet who liked the first Assassin’s Creed.  It sold a boatload of copies, but apparently everyone hated it!  It certainly frustrated me.  The repetition I could handle.  The clunky combat (at times) I could handle.  What I could not handle was the fact that about 30 minutes from beating the game it all the sudden became completely unplayable.  I’ve not encountered anything so glitch-ridden in all my years of gaming, even on the PC.  I assumed at first it was some story-based deal with the Animus and I was just playing it wrong.  After a bit of internet research I found that sadly no, that wasn’t it at all.

 Despite my frustrations with the first game, I was ready for Assassin’s Creed 2.  I love open world games, even though they’re losing their vogue, and I love games that let me put a blade through the back of someone’s neck.  I also adore Renaissance Italy and paintings of naked women.  Assassin’s Creed 2 offers all of these things and a whole bunch more. 

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Fitness buffs have long known the benefits of using the Wii as an exercise machine via extensions such as Wii Fit, EA Active Personal Trainer, or even simple games such as WarioWare: Smooth Moves, which asks you to pose accordingly in order to be successful. As of late I’ve taken it upon myself to get in better shape, so I’ve taken advantage of the glut of options available to me in order to facilitate my own fitness program. For a while I had my eye on Ubisoft’s Just Dance, a music/rhythm game that encourages you to get up off your derriere and get into the action by dancing your little heart out. Unfortunately, the game doesn’t work too well as it was intended, but if you simply use the game as a visual guide to shaking what your mama gave you, it does provide an intensive and entertaining workout if you’re willing to throw your inhibitions — and possibly your dignity — out the door.

Just Dance asks you to slither off of the couch and into the groove with a selection of thirty tracks, including “Groove is in the Heart,” “Wannabe,” “Surfin’ Bird,” and “Can’t Get You Out of My Head.” This rather paltry song selection includes tunes that are guaranteed to get the blood pumping through your veins and your heart beating furiously while you work up a sweat in the comfort of your own living room. They can be a little corny, but most certainly infectious and easy to get excited about as you work your way through the game. The word “game” is applied as a rather loose term here, as most of the enjoyment you’ll find yourself having will be through following motion-captured dancers onscreen rather than scoring points.

It’s extremely simple to get into. All you need is a Wii remote and the game, or a few friends to join in on the fun if you can handle the embarrassment (if you’re not a wild child who loves to dance). Choose a song, whether you’d like to play the short version or full version, and watch the onscreen dancing silhouette. Once the song begins, a short countdown will commence, followed by visual cues that aid in helping you to figure out which dance move will be performed next. The choreography is not stilted in that it will not stop and break down individual dance moves for beginners. You either follow the prompts onscreen or you will not succeed. It’s quite punishing for those with slow reflexes, as the prompts that fly across the screen and are not exactly easy to follow. They do give a good general idea of where to hold your arms and legs, but implementing them in the middle of the song as you struggle to follow the dancer can be quite difficult.

As hard as it can be to get the dance moves down pat, at the very least there are only a couple sets of predetermined steps to memorize. They will be performed over and over in each song, so if you want to play the same song several times over, you’ll eventually be able to master it. It all works well in theory, but fails miserably in practice. Since the game works to track your movements and successes with motion-sensing via the sensor bar and Wii remote, Just Dance finds it difficult to score you correctly when you will often place the remote in different locations than the game would imagine. Different people hold the controller in the opposite hand, nearer or further away from the sensor, and various other locations that make it hard for you to “pass” a song in the traditional sense. You’ll often work up a powerful sweat but end up performing miserably on a song regardless of how well you worked it. This essentially renders the in-game scoring useless as any real indicator of your dancing prowess. Accurate scoring is a gamble, and it’s a real shame since there really is no other aspect of Just Dance that makes it a real “game” aside from the fact that friends need only shake a Wii remote to join in.

But don’t be completely put off — there’s plenty of fun to be had. If you dance your heart out and put a full amount of effort into the game, your score will be increased, as it truly rewards dancing with thought behind it. It’s a fantastic game for those who simply love to dance, want to learn some choreographed steps to some of their favorite songs, or people like me who want to get in better shape via video games. If you actually try rather than shake the Wii remote haphazardly, then you’ll start to see some results both in your waistline and in-game. The game could most certainly benefit from DLC or additional song packages, but what’s offered is a viable fitness bonanza that will get booties shakin’ and friends guffawing at how ridiculous you all look. Still, for an MSRP of $39.99, it’s hard to recommend Just Dance over Dance Dance Revolution or even fitness packages such as EA Active Personal Trainer. If you enjoy dancing, though, Just Dance would be ideal at $19.99 or less.

Doin It RIGHT:- You’ll get a great workout if you actually try. - Energetic songs. - Most songs are licensed save for a couple covers.	Doin It RONG:- Less a game than a dance choreography video. - Can be difficult to learn several dance steps. - Low replay value unless you just…really love those songs.
FINAL SCORE: 6 / 10

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In 2003, I was unfortunately an idiot.  I spent 98% of my gaming time trapped in MMORPG-land.  As this was the golden age of PlayStation 2 gaming, I feel foolish for having been trapped. Though I missed out on many games in the years between 2000 and 2006, I did finally go back and play one that I had heard nothing but quality things about.  It starred a young reporter named Jade, and I quickly realized just what a treasure I had missed.

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Reading Spawn Kill is fine and all, but wouldn’t it be absolutely wonderful if there were real voices to accompany you on one of your many repeat visits? Of course it would be. That’s why all of us at Spawn Kill are proud to bring you the Kill Kast, the official Spawn Kill podcast.

On this Very Special First Episode, Tigresa and Molotov Cupcake have a little chat about the intricacies of E3, at a glance – the highs, the lows, the inexplicably bad marketing toward tweens! If you want to take Spawn Kill on the go with you, consider this post your saving grace! Feel free to download, tell your friends, post and repost, and comment here with your suggestions, raves, rants, anything! We’re ready to listen.

For future reference, we will be answering questions on upcoming episodes, so make sure to direct all questions you may want answered to contact@spawnkill.com or one of our individual addresses. We’ll make sure we answer all pertinent inquiries! With that said, check this mutha out – we’re kinda proud.

Oh, and we can’t believe you’ve had to ask, but Molotov isn’t really crying. Jeez.

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If you missed out on our incessant fangirl live tweeting on Monday and Tuesday during the Microsoft, EA, Ubisoft, Nintendo, and Sony conferences we’re posting up a recap of the action. This one is the Ubisoft conference by Molotov Cupcake… Check it out! Think uber Ubi highlight: Assassin’s Creed gets even more stealthy and violent.

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The recent scans of Nintendo Power’s June 2009 issue cover revealed that Red Steel 2 is indeed in development at Ubisoft Paris. Apparently the title is headed for a holiday 2009 release and will feature cel-shaded graphics.

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Assassin’s Creed fans, start your Christmas lists now:  the new game has been slated for a Holiday 2009 release, and, surprisingly, will be released on the Wii in addition to the PS3, 360, and PSP.  Nintendo owners should be particularly pleased with the news, as they missed out on the original game, which was only available on the Xbox 360, PS2, and PC.

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